*Now, I love my boys and love being a SAHM and homemaker, but some days its overwhelming*
Today, I'm just consumed with real life.
If I'm being honest there are moments when I feel as though I cannot handle one more minute of toddler talk in the "whine pitch" (moms of toddlers know what I'm referring to).
Moments where I'm cleaning the floor for the 7th time that day and look up to see my piles of freshly folded clean laundry now being played with as toys on the floor. Moments where after taking my child to use the potty for 12,000 times in the past hour he still has an accident.
Moments where I literally convince myself I'm not hungry only because the last thing on earth I want to think about is making dinner.
Moments where you realize that you rarely leave the house for any other reason than grocery shopping simply because it is like running a marathon to just get out the door.
Moments where all you want to do is drink a cup of coffee fresh out of the pot....without having to reheat it at least 3 times due to interruptions.
Moments where you acknowledge how often you glance at the clock throughout the day calculating how much time is left before daddy comes home.
Moments where you just once want to wake up without immediately having to meet the need of somene else.
This is what my house looks like after finally being able to put my boys down for a nap this afternoon....
dishes to be washed....dishwasher filling up only1/2 hour after I emptied it
crumbs from lunch, half eaten banana from breakfast, puzzle pieces dumped from the trick or treating Elmo bucket last night
toys and books in every cranny
more toys and items placed on the desk to be out of Jonah's reach
And now Benjamin is sitting in time-out for NOT taking a nap and throwing his sheets all over his room. And the mess is still there because I could not muster up any energy to do anything for the hour he was upstairs. In all honesty, my motivation to pick up and finish cleaning the kitchen will be so that Peter doesn't come home to see the identical picture he saw when he left at lunch and wonder what I did all afternoon.Yes, I know these moments pass. And I know the good far outweighs the bad. And I know I'm beyond blessed in my life. Believe me, I know. But in keeping in real, right now, I'm in the hard and consuming moments of my role. I want to look back at this blog journal of mine and remember all the moments of this stage of my life so I'm choosing to keep it real and write it down.
Off to clean up.....only now it's even more fun since both my boys are awake. How much longer till daddy comes home???
I feel your pain. It is an endless cycle!
ReplyDeleteOh girlie, I hear ya! I just spent my 'extra hour' deep cleaning the bathroom...yep one bathroom, while Jer fell asleep on the couch listening to the beaver game. I just realized there is not enough time in the day to get it all done so night time has become my friend! And I think I have a coffee cup still sitting in my microwave ;)
ReplyDeleteIt does get better though...better's not the right word, but I'm getting glimpses of the older kid life, and it is beautifully challenging in it's own way. We are blessed, even though the moments can paralyze, and add up, we are blessed :)
Love you so much friend!